This is Part 2 of Peaceful Prayer.
In this post I look at the stress of praying as an infant or child. The stress level of prayer decreases the more relationally mature I become. It is very stressful praying as a relationally mature (RM) child. At the same time and on the same scale, my prayers increase in effectiveness as I become more relationally mature as an adult and then as a parent and elder! And why would that be?
Well, This site is about relational maturity and my personal journey in it. As a relational infant, my prayers were all about me and my wants and needs. I was incapable of physically taking care of myself and I totally depended on others (my mom and dad) to take care of my needs. I was blessed with Godly parents who loved and cared for me. I really didn’t need to ask for much of anything because they know what I needed and provided that for for me. However, I obtained a type A trauma and never learned how to properly ask for what I needed or wanted.
As a child, I was learning all the rules of life and what should and shouldn’t be done. That is when I noticed how many people weren’t doing the correct things. As I grew physically older, my prayers were about having God control, or punish, or do something about those people. People would do wrong things and God often seemed to not pay any attention to them. I stayed in this frustrating relational maturity of a child well into my mid life. I developed the incorrect thought process that God owes me since my parents were missionaries and had done a lot of good for others. He should bless me extra because of my works and the rules I did follow. It didn’t work and I gave up on praying any meaningful prayers.
As a relationally mature adult, I tried bargaining with God, but that didn’t work either. He even told me not to give any more tithe because He didn’t need or want it. That really knocked the props out from under me. Now what did I have to offer Him??
It wasn’t until I reached parent RM that I realized I needed to let Him be in total control of my life and the life of others. I just needed to join in what He was and is doing at this time…. in this situation ….. And I needed to not just watch Him; But, I needed to join Him in being how he is (loving always).
Sooo…. What does His love look like? Does mine match His? Loving with accountability! As a parent who is relationally mature, I can now live and pray peacefully in and with His love for all.