If I am going to play beautiful music I need to practice. If I am going to play beautiful music in harmony with you, I have to practice my keys and then I need to practice harmonizing my keys with yours. We then practice playing together in harmony! To do this we must keep time. Without precise timing, the notes won’t harmonize.
It is critical for me to practice keeping my reality real. This means keeping it current. In any good relationship I must keep up to date on what is going on in the life and mind of the other person. That reality is continually changing. What I once thought, I no longer do, how I once was, I no longer am, I once was walking in sin, I no longer am, I was a relational child, I now am a relational adult. No one is static and our minds will continue to mature relationally as we learn new skills. I need to have mind-sight both into myself and into you.
I was totally shocked and amazed when after a 20 year separation from my ex-wife, we amicably came together and discussed some of the history of our breakup ….. We both were shocked about how wrong we were about what had actually been done, said, and believed. We both had built and lived in a false reality of fear, shame, avoidance and enemy mode for 20 years ….. Wow, we both apologized. I especially had been a relational infant at the time.
How are you doing? is a very real question that requires a very real up to date response in order for me to have updated mind sight and real reality.