How did I mature relationally? This has been a long and often scary and painful journey for me. It has not been quick and easy. I am sharing with you some key individual steps that freed me to be able to mature from an infant and child to a parent and elder. No, I’m not there yet, even though I have been on this journey for over 3 years, but I can see the maturity traits emerging from the life struggles. This meditation is number 2 in a series.
Here is key number 2. I had to give up power and control and trust Jesus to be my Guide. I had to learn to follow. While I knew he would guide me into all truth, this was a scary step for me. What if He led me where I didn’t want to go…. what if there was pain or discomfort involved ….. what if there was loss …… what if He didn’t do what I wanted Him to do??? I had avoided and quietly fought this control issue for decades. And it had led to nothing but bliss…. NOT …. But, as a relational child, I had to be in control in order to succeed ….. Hmmmm ….. succeed at what????
I had lived life from a hard work and push through to get it done performance and production base. Any heart talk was very secondary and generally a waste of time. Just get over it and let’s get on with it. As a hard working child, I got a lot done. But, those close to me fell by the way side. While I was outstanding in my field, I would find myself left alone, out standing in my field.
So, what or who could I trust besides myself? Jesus was a little scary too ….